Showing posts with label 1980s. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 1980s. Show all posts

Monday, 17 April 2017

N is for Naada and Nirona #atozchallenge

I was all set to do a photo essay on Nirona village in Kutchch when a comment I heard this weekend made my brain cells go PING! and I decided to go down this route instead.

Naa-da (Punjabi) or Naa-la (Hindi) is the drawstring that one uses to keep the pajamas from falling.

But before we get into the seams to find our way out of the casing, let me explain a little about Indian clothing. 

When Max, the doctor, (played by Patrick Swayze in the movie) is attracted to the idea that Indian women don't obsess about their waist sizes like the western ones he'd come across in his fictional life as a character in the book, City of Joy (by Dominique Lapierre), I, the reader of the book, smirk. I smirk because Max is not acquainted with the fact that Indian clothing (to cover the bottom half) almost always comes with an adjustable waist band.

Here in the world of  salwars, pyjamas, churidaars and petticoats, there's never any need to fit into a size 2 or 8 or 12. You can grow as big as the proverbial piece of string or in our case, the naada. What Max doesn't realise is that when he was being set as a character in the novel in the 70s India, a typical Indian woman was making her trip to her tailor, who was measuring her waist and cutting the cloth she'd brought with her to fit her waist (whatever her circumference) and not the other way round.

Teaching your kids to tie the naada in India is the western equivalent of teaching them how to tie their shoe laces. Only difference is, while a shoddily tied naada can cause you immense embarrassment, a sloppy job with shoe laces can trip you up and cause a different kind of pain.

Once you've mastered the art of tying your pajame ka naada  (drawstrings), you can go and get married. I mean you are ready to embark upon your life's path as dreamed up by your parents and as depicted in stereotypical western dramas (dare I say, not without reason): A+ school student, engineer or doctor, holder of a safe and well paid job, married with children, etc.

But, wait. Hang on a tic. It's not the tying of the naada that's an issue, it's the ruddy untying of it that leaves emotional scars so deep, one seeks counselling even when one doesn't believe it works. One is Indian, you see.

In the 70's and the 80's, as a wee one, you had the right to shake your mum or wake your sister to help you to untie the naada in the middle of night when you needed to wee and your fumbling fingers refused to co-operate. It was acceptable. Of course, the elastic band had been invented by then but there were times when you ended up wearing that one pj which hadn't been elasticated yet.

It's when you're all grown up and dressed up in the 90s and you're going out for a night of merriment, dressed in your best salwaar kameez, kurta pajama or saree that comic and life shattering experiences abound.

Imagine an evening of dance, music, good food and wine. Everyone's happy. You decide to go to powder your nose. The ladies' loo is unusually queue free. So you decide to pee too. Why miss a chance like this? You feel so good about your terrific timing and presence of mind. Now you can go on for another couple of hours and not stand in a queue. Happy with this thought,  you yank the naada to undo the knot. It seems stuck. Did I tie a double knot? You can't remember. But you try again and this time you tease the knot to ease it up a bit. The cotton threads that make the naada soft and washable decide to behave like steal wire today. You yank a little, tease a little, then yank a little more. You keep your cool. It's a naada, after all. You've done this in your sleep. It'll yield. It has to. You didn't even need to pee. But now the bladder has sensed that you're in a loo. So he gets all excited and decides he needs a release. The brain is trying to cope with two conflicting signal: bladder vs fingers. Who will win? You breathe in and tell your adrenaline to shush and just let the fingers do their thing. You can hear a few voices outside the door now. People are starting to shuffle close to the cubicle. Then a knock. Yes, you tell them, it's occupied.

That knock tips the scales and the adrenaline takes over completely. Fingers get sweaty and bladder is blasting to explode. No! You get the tweezers out (the tiny ones you always carry with you in your bag for the pesky chin hair that seem to show up only on your nights out and only after you've hugged and air-kissed all your friends at close quarters). Fumble. Fumble. Plop. The tweezers look up at you from their watery grave and the sight of water makes the bladder weak at his knees.

You know you've lost your battle and any street credit you may have picked up that evening when you feel the first wet drop.

You unlock the cubicle door and holler, does anyone have scissors? My naada is stuck.

Universal sisterhood rises to the challenge. You are saved just in time. You tinkle like you've never tinkled before and see the Divine right in front of you. That feeling! That release!

You step out, wash your hands, avoid eye contact, slink out without saying goodbye to your friends. And promise yourself to never, ever, go close to a naada. It's elastic from now on or hooks or buttons or zips...not zips, you tell yourself. Remember that scene in that film? But that was a man, you justify and feel a smile spreading inside of you. Safe in the comfort of your home and pull up pants, you can see the funny side of the evening.

Wardrobe malfunction stories are a dime a dozen when it comes to naada tying, untying, breaking in half while tying , or old naadas giving up their ghost while you're in the middle of a busy bazaar bargaining.

Have clothes ever put you in a pickle? Do share (if you can or would like to).
*****
And here are nine (clever, right?) pictures of Nirona village in Kutchh to give you a little flavour.
For more details about this village of artisans, check out NIRONA







 Wooden utensils and toys made by hand and coloured with natural pigment and mustard oil.
Ordinary moments of ordinary days 
is all that my heart desires.

Leaving you with a few lines from The Sage's Tao Te Ching
by
William Martin
Every Ordinary Moment
Our thoughts are becoming clearer,
and our needs are becoming more simple.
Enough to eat,
a comfortable bed,
and the glow of friendship
suffice to delight us.
*****

Tuesday, 14 March 2017

Holi springs colour

Photo Courtesy: Google Images
Flowers of Jungle flame aka Tesu ke phool

I love colour. Therefore, I love Holi. It's my favourite festival. As a child, drenched in the innocence of small town India, I played Holi with abandon, gulaal (colour) and dhamaal (utter madness).

Gujjia (stuffed and sweet pastry) and pichkaaris (water pistols) and Tesu ke phool (flowers of Jungle flame) occupied my thoughts and senses for days leading  up to Holi.

My sister, brother and I, along with half a dozen kids from our neighbourhood, would fill water balloons -- their rubbery necks stretched around the spout of a tap attached to a tank or any tap that was free to use. It didn't matter whose house we were in. Almost organically, a band of bandits would form. I remember, as a seven year old, I would hang out with teenagers and toddlers and our jhund (band) of mismatched heights and ages would behave like one organism, safe in numbers, with only one goal in mind: to play Holi. Angry aunties whose water supply would be in serious danger of running dry couldn't dampen our enthusiastic balloon filling quest one bit. The entire mohalla (neighbourhood) tuned into a giant aangan (courtyard) filled with multi-coloured faces, white kurta pyjamas and shrieking kids.

70's turned into 80's in Dehradun. Economic progress came wrapped up in plastic. Metal pichkaaris which worked perfectly well were replaced by plastic ones which looked better than they worked. The effect was never the same. The plastic water pistols squirted a frustratingly feeble trickle compared to the roaring jet of the metal ones. The shiny plastic button that one had to press hard to release the jet of water would break within the first hour of purchase. We would then use the fiddly things as mere holders of coloured water and unscrew the top or the bottom to tip the water over friends/foes to play Holi.

The novelty of these toys would wear out quite quickly and in the excitement of all the colour that had yet to be smothered, the poor plastic pistols would lie orphaned and abandoned in some neighbour's garden or worse, in a naali (open drain) somewhere. Until, of course, the mothers and fathers yelled at the children to go look for such an expensive purchase. They would, sometimes softly and often hysterically loudly, explain to you in front of the entire mohalla (neighbourhood) that it was your fault this cheap contraption had been bought in the first place and that it was you who had pestered them to get it by saying your Holi would be incomplete without it. Before long, the neighbourhood would split into us (the children) and them (the parents). Long after we, the children, had forgotten the yelling, heads of parents would be seen shaking to each other to the tune of, "Yeh aajkal ke bachhe...paise ki kadra nahin jaante." Kids these days don't know the value of money.

Collective and public telling off would be followed by 'discipline' in the privacy of homes, after dinner and before bedtime, when the probability of a neighbour dropping in unannounced was almost zero: a bit of ear twisting or a serious sounding threat to never buy you another toy for as long as you live or a stinging slap or anything that was seen as appropriate punishment by the respective parent. It all depended on how strict or kind your parents were.

Don't worry, neither the children nor the parents will remember this next year and the entire episode described above will get repeated, only the plastic pistols will change as those would've been bought new, you see.

Back to the actual Holi -- so when all the blubbery balloon missiles had been used up and almost all the powder colour lay plastered on us or the streets, and none of the pichkaaris co-operated anymore, we'd  resort to the 'balti ka paani'...the murky water in the communal bucket where everyone and their khandaan (extended family) had mixed their colour to fill up their pichkaaris and gubbare (water balloons).

We knew instinctively that once this 'balti ka paani' was over, our mothers would call us  back in to get cleaned up and become human again. In other words, Holi would be shown its 'THE END' slide as soon as the 'balti ka paani'  finished. Magically, the bucket never emptied.

"Bunty, enough! Come in NOW!" some neighbour would call out to her son/daughter.

"Abhi balti ka paani khatam nahin hua Mummy!" The bucket is not yet empty Mum!

Dehradun lost its innocence almost as soon as I turned twelve. Suddenly. Holi came with its own instruction manual. Do this, Don't do this. Go there, but not there. Don't mix with those people. Avoid boys at all costs if they were not from your family or neighbourhood.

For the first time, I was warned to look beyond the vibrant haze of Holi ke rang (colours) and take notice of the filth that may linger in the minds of humans dressed in pure white kurta pyjamas wearing colourful smiles.

Words like chhedd-chhadd (eve- teasing) and sexual harassment cropped up like weeds and took root, deep and damaging.

Back then, the burden of growing up was gifted exclusively to girls, innocently wrapped up in tameez (etiquette) and sanskaar (values)

 "Girls should play Holi sensibly beta... Mundya da ki hai (What of boys?)"

This rhetorical question bothered me! What of boys? Why were they never asked to be careful when they turned twelve? What made them different?

Hormones, tameez (etiquette) and riwaaz (traditions) muted the colours of Holi and for a good many years I played the censored version, called insanon wali Holi (the way humans play Holi). It wasn't bad but the rebel in me would look at all the gangs of boys hanging out on the chaurahas (intersections) without any curfews or restrictions and wonder why?

When I got married, my license to play 'jhallon wali Holi' (mad aka fun Holi) was renewed. My husband became my bodyguard and I'd go and play with abandon and dance like Amitabh Bachchan till my feet hurt and still carry on. My husband would hold his glass of thandai or beer and stand near me, not too close but close enough (he's not so keen on dancing). This way I'd be able to have my fun and not get hassled by eager or drunk revelers! Perfect!

The fact that I need a man (my husband) to feel safe among other men when playing Holi says a lot about this land of  Shakti and Kali and Rani Laxmibai and Sita and Meera and Durga.

Although I miss my bhachpan ki (childhood) Holi, to tell you the truth, these days I don't need balloons or colour or pichkaari or thandai to feel its abundant joy. Grateful to be alive, I like to relish the gift of a new day when I open my eyes in the morning to witness another day unfold, another flower bloom, another blade of grass kiss drops of dew, listen to birds sing a new tune or even an old one, watch the sky fold its cover of day and spread the sheets of night, speckled with stars. Everyday is a celebration of colour.

Every now and then, I do get sidetracked by the mundane busyness of the day to day ('functioning as a human' as my yoga teacher calls it) and then some unknown force makes me click on Sadhguru's video and I hear him say how one must smile when one gets up in the morning for it's a precious gift, this life we live.

"Notice the things that you are drawn to." says Anusha when we, her students, look up to her in wide eyed wonderment and some sprinkling of doubt on our quest to find who the real 'us' is.

I pay closer attention to my day. Paying attention brings up even more to be grateful for and even more to be joyful about. Holi no longer comes in a plastic packet of synthetic colour.

Spring sprinkles his colours and shows me the way. I follow with a smile.

Come and feast your eyes on the colours that a patch of green has yielded this spring. It doesn't get more blissful than this:)


Group shot:Onion, neem, cabbage, cualiflower, spinach, fenugreek, mulberry, basil and papaya
Ripe mulberry (almost ready to eat) Shehtoot
 Waiting their turn...the young ones.
Baingan ka phool aka Eggplant Flower
This shiny gem was made into a yummy baingan aaloo ki sabzi by my mother-in-law today.
Velvet and butter...the pretty pansies.
Blooming onion
Tomato flower
and tomatoes
Problem in paradise!
These two are not on talking terms: each waiting for the other to say 'sorry' first!
Yup..they're a couple.
I'm not sure what these flowers are called. I've always referred to them as local larkspurs.
 Zinnia
Lantana
I bought this sapling from a local nursery because I like the shape and colour of the leaves. 
Please enlighten me with its name, if you know this shrub.
Wabi Sabi
 Newly born neem leaves tickling the fluffy sky. 
Purple Basil in fragrant bloom
 Aparajita or Butterfly pea

Lit up and lighting up -- I love sunflowers:)


May I know how to nourish the seeds of joy in myself every day. May I be able to live fresh, solid, and free. May I be free from attachment and aversion, but not be indifferent.
— Thich Nhat Hanh

Thank you Archana for posting this beautiful quote.
One LAST offering: A ghazal written by Faiz 
sung by Tanya Wells.
Enjoy:)
Thanks Anu for sharing this gem.



Saturday, 16 April 2016

N is for Nagin Dance

Dancing is like breathing to me. It exhilarates me. It energizes me. I never need a reason to dance. I've never felt the need for a teacher to show me how to. Just like breathing, I can do it. I may look like a total buffoon doing it, but I don't care. I dance with abandonment- in private, in public, on dance floors and in Holi parties. But my favourite place to dance is at an Indian wedding. The dhols and dholaks (drums) demand dance. My two favourite moves are Nagin (snake) dance and the Bhangra (Punjabi folk dance) followed closely by Amitabh Bachchan style thumkas!

What's Nagin dance? Here's a video that shows all the moves one can spot at an Indian wedding, starting with -- you got it-- Nagin Dance at number 1. Enjoy:)
What I'm about to tell you about Indian weddings is purely based on my memories. This is how things were back in the 70s and 80s and 90s. It's changed a lot now. 

Weddings were a chaotic cacophony of organic, home spun music on dholaks, chattering cousins, grumbling grandmas, copious cups of tea being made and served, lip-smacking food being prepared in large quantities by maharaj jis (chefs one hires to cope with feeding the extended family and their cousins, neighbours. etc.) who, it was implied, would eat at the shaadi wala ghar (wedding house) for five days at least- three before the big day, on the big day and at least breakfast on the day after the big day.

Riotous weddings of my childhood memories rested on the following four pillars:
1. Dancing
2. Food
3. Clothes or shopping for clothes, and
4. The obligatory and almost always unintentional upsetting of important relatives, who then expressed their unhappiness by either walking out (with lots of drama) or sulk loudly in (no, not in a corner) the most visible part of the mandap (platform where the bride and groom sit). Uncannily, this sulking face will haunt you for as long as you have your wedding album because the sulker makes it his moral duty to photo bomb almost ALL of the family shots taken on the day he/she decided to throw a hissy fit.

Trust me, even today, you may manage to have a quieter wedding with less dancing or simple food or moderately priced clothes, but you can NOT have an Indian wedding where you don't upset at least one member of your family. At least one upset uncle or aunt is mandatory . We've had entire families staging a walk out on something as simple as menu choices. Say, for example, if chicken tikka happens to be on display and a vegan uncle turns up at the wrong time. We are an emotional bunch and food gets us all wound up.

Back to my favourite part; dancing, which was and still is my favourite pillar, followed by shopping and food.

Only when I sat down to write today, did I wonder about the origin of Nagin dance. The other dances you saw in the video are a mishmash of folk dances like the Bhangra and the Garba (Gujarati folk dance) and now of course, hip hop. Nagin dance, I reckon, slithered into our weddings from Indian cinema. If you know more about its origin, please share. It's always accompanied by 'been' music. That's the flute a snake charmer plays.

Wikipedia suggests that the first Indian film that used been music and Nagin dance was:
Nagin (1954).  
I'll have to rely on Wikipedia as I'm pressed for time to do more research.
The following video is the real deal. This is what most dancers try to emulate at weddings or on dance floors. 
The drunk uncles are hilarious to watch, and apologies if you are one of them.
I probably look like a tipsy auntyji myself when I have my hands up in the air-- cobra style,
 but I still feel nineteen when I'm dancing. 
And that's all that matters.
I like to move it...move it...come on, join me...shake a leg:)

I'm certainly looking forward to switching off for a day. Have a fun Sunday.
See you on Monday. 

Saturday, 22 August 2015

Jamun Tree

This is a first for me. A short story that I'd written a few months ago was published on Wednesday! Wohoooo:)

Wednesday had been set aside to sort through my daughter's things: the throw-in-the-bin pile, the taking-with-her-to-University pile, the-stuff-to-leave-behind pile and the-can't-decide-now-will-look-at-later pile. That was the plan.

Messenger buzzed to inform me that my story would be online any minute; would I like to add a Bio and a photograph?
Bio- yes, photograph- not sure.

The two lines of Bio were easy to write, but finding a photo that fit the image in my head of what I look like proved too challenging. A cartoon avatar will have to do.

Here's the story:

http://kindlemag.in/jamun-tree/

Let me know what you think...
please share-
if you enjoyed it
and
let me know if you didn't.


Like a puppy with too many new toys to play with, I was too excited to focus on anything that day. The can't -decide-pile of things in my daughter's room has turned into a mountain! Let's hope I can find my focus to help her whittle through it tomorrow.

For some of you, jamun may be an unknown fruit, so here are a few pictures and facts:

Image result for free pictures of jamun tree with fruit

Image result for free pictures of jamun tree with fruit
These  pictures have been copied from Google Images.

Six months ago, I bought a jamun sapling from a local nursery. That day, while I was easing out the roots of the young tree into a pot, my childhood summer memories kept flashing on and on till I sat myself down and started writing. 

A blogger friend has written a beautifully illustrated post about charpoys-- here's the link.


Have a lovely weekend everyone.